Libretto: Così fan tutte

Thus Do All Women or The School for Lovers Cast: FIORDILIGI and DORABELLA, Ladies of Ferrara and sisters living in Napoli GUGLIELMO, Officer, in love with Fiordiligi FERRANDO, Officer, in love with Dorabella DESPINA, Chambermaid of the ladies DON ALFONSO, an old Philosopher CHORUS soldiers, sailors, servants, wedding guests, populace FIRST ACT FIRST SCENE A coffee-house Ferrando, Don Alfonso and Guglielmo No. 1 - Trio FERRANDO My Dorabella couldn't Do such a thing: Heaven made her As faithful as she's fair. GUGLIELMO My Fiordiligi simply Couldn't betray me: I believe her constancy Equals her beauty. DON ALFONSO My hair is already grey, I speak with authority; But let's have done With argument. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO No, you've told us They could be faithless; If you're honest You will prove it. DON ALFONSO Let's not trouble with proof. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO setting their bands to their swords No, no, we demand it: Or out with your sword And we'll break up this friendship, DON ALFONSO O what folly To try to discover The wrong which will make us wretched When we've found it! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO He strikes at my honour Who allows his lips To utter a word Which does her wrong. Recitative GUGLIELMO Draw your sword! Choose which of us you'd prefer. DON ALFONSO calmly I'm a peaceable man And don't touch steel Except at table. FERRANDO Either fight, Or say at once Why you suspect our sweethearts Could possibly be untrue. DON ALFONSO Sweet simplicity, how I love it! FERRANDO A truce to your jests, Or I swear, by heaven ... DON ALFONSO And I swear by this world, My friends, I'm not jesting; I'd only like to know What kind of creatures Are these beauties of yours, if they're flesh and blood and bone like us, If they eat like us, and wear skirts, If, in fact, they're goddesses or women ... FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO They're women, but the like of them ... DON ALFONSO And in woman you expect To find fidelity? How I love such simplicity! No. 2 - Trio DON ALFONSO Woman's constancy Is like the Arabian Phoenix; Everyone swears it exists, But no one knows where. FERRANDO The phoenix is my Dorabella. GUGLIELMO The phoenix is my Fiordiligi. DON ALFONSO It's neither one nor the other. It never existed, and never will. Recitative FERRANDO Poets' nonsense! GUGLIELMO Old men's drivel! DON ALFONSO Well then, listen, But without flying into a rage: What proof have you That your loves are always true to you? What makes you so sure That their hearts are steadfast? FERRANDO Long acquaintance. GUGLIELMO Their noble upbringing. FERRANDO Their sublime thoughts. GUGLIELMO Kindred feelings. FERRANDO Unselfishness. GUGLIELMO Steadfast characters. FERRANDO Their promises. GUGLIELMO Their protests. FERRANDO Their oaths. DON ALFONSO Tears and sighs, caresses, swoons. Excuse me if I laugh! FERRANDO Confound you! Stop taunting us! DON ALFONSO Gently, gently; what if I prove Conclusively to you today That they're just like the others? GUGLIELMO It couldn't be! FERRANDO Impossible! DON ALFONSO Shall we bet on it? FERRANDO We're on! DON ALFONSO A hundred sequins. GUGLIELMO A thousand, if you like. DON ALFONSO My hand on it! FERRANDO Both hands! DON ALFONSO Swear not to give a sign, a whisper, A hint of all this To your Penelopes. FERRANDO We swear. DON ALFONSO On your honour as soldiers? GUGLIELMO On our honour as soldiers. DONALFONSO And you'll do Everything I tell you to? FERRANDO Everything! GUGLIELMO Even more! DON ALFONSO Well done! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO And well done, Dear Don Alfonso! FERRANDO We'll make merry at your expense. GUGLIELMO to Ferrando What shall we do with the hundred sequins? No. 3 - Trio FERRANDO I'll arrange a fine serenade For my goddess. GUGLIELMO In honour of Venus I will give a banquet. DON ALFONSO Shall I be invited? FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Yes, you shall be there. FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO AND DON ALFONSO And many a toast we'll offer To the god of love. exeunt SECOND SCENE A garden by the seashore. Fiordiligi and Dorabella are both gazing at miniatures hanging round their necks No. 4 - Duet FIORDILIGI Ah tell me sister, If one could ever find A nobler face, A sweeter mouth. DORABELLA Just look, See what fire Is in his eye, If flames and darts Do not seem to flash forth! FIORDILIGI This is the face Of a soldier and a lover. DORABELLA This is a face Both charming and alarming. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA How happy I am! If ever my heart Changes its affection, May love make me Live in pain. Recitative FIORDILIGI This morning I feel in the mood For some mischief: I've a fire, A tingling in my veins. If Guglielmo knew what pranks I'll play on him when he comes! DORABELLA To tell the truth, I also feel something new Stirring within me: I'd swear That we're not far from the altar. FIORDILIGI Give me your hand: I want to read it. Well, there's a clear M; and here's a P! That's it ? Marriage Prospects! DORABELLA That suits me splendidly. FIORDILIGI And I'll have no objections. DORABELLA But why on earth do our lovers Delay in coming? It's six o'clock already. THIRD SCENE The afore?mentioned and Don Alfonso FIORDILIGI There they are! DORABELLA No, it's not them: It's their friend Don Alfonso. FIORDILIGI Welcome, Don Alfonso! DON ALFONSO Your servant! DORABELLA What is it? Why are you alone? You shed a tear? Speak, for pity's sake: What has happened? My lover ... FIORDILIGI My dearest ... DON ALFONSO O cruel fate! No. 5 - Aria DON ALFONSO I would speak, but my courage fails: My lips stammer. I cannot say the words, Which stay locked inside me. What will you do? What shall I? O dire misfortune! It could not be worse. I grieve for you and for them! Recitative FIORDILIGI Mercy! For pity's sake, Don Alfonso, do not torment us so. DON ALFONSO You will need to summon All your courage, my dears. DORABELLA O heaven! What harm has befallen them? What disaster? Is my beloved killed? FIORDILIGI Is mine dead? DON ALFONSO No, not dead, but nearly as bad. DORABELLA Wounded? DON ALFONSO No. FIORDILIGI Sick? DON ALFONSO Not that either. FIORDILIGI Well, what then? DON ALFONSO The royal command has called them To the battlefield. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Alas, what do I hear? FIORDILIGI And they are going? DON ALFONSO At once. DORABELLA Is there no way of stopping them? DON ALFONSO None. FIORDILIGI Not a single farewell? DON ALFONSO The poor fellows Hadn't the courage to see you; But if you wish it, They are willing. DORABELLA Where are they? DON ALFONSO Come in, my friends! FOURTH SCENE The afore-mentioned, Ferrando and Guglielmo (in travelling clothes) No. 6 - Quintet GUGLIELMO O Heaven, I feel my steps falter In their progress towards you. FERRANDO My trembling lips Cannot utter the words. DON ALFONSO In moments of the greatest stress A hero calls up all his strength. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Now that we have heard the news, One detail remains for you to do; Be brave, and plunge your blade Into this heart. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO My love, blame fate If I must abandon you. DORABELLA to Guglielmo No, no, do not go! FIORDILIGI to Ferrando Cruel one, do not leave me! DORABELLA I would sooner tear my heart out! FIORDILIGI I would sooner die at your feet! FERRANDO aside, to Don Alfonso What did I say? GUGLIELMO aside, to Don Alfonso Do you see now? DON ALFONSO aside Patience, friend; We've not reached the end yet! ALL Thus destiny confounds Our mortal hopes. Ah who, amid such sorrow, Can ever more delight in life? Recitative GUGLIELMO Do not weep, my darling! FERRANDO Do not despair, My dearest love! DON ALFONSO Leave them that comfort. They have Only too good cause to grieve. FIORDILIGI Who knows if we shall ever meet again! DORABELLA Who knows if you will ever return! They embrace tenderly. FIORDILIGI Leave me this dagger: may it Bring me death if ever cruel fate In that bosom dear to me ... DORABELLA I should die of grief, Even without a dagger. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO My love, do not make Such gloomy predictions! Heaven will assure your peace of mind So long as I live. DON ALFONSO to himself The comedy is delightful, And both are playing their parts well. A drum is heard FERRANDO O heavens! That is the fatal drum that comes To tear me from my treasure! DON ALFONSO Friends, here is the boat. FIORDILIGI I'm fainting! DORABELLA I'm dying! FIFTH SCENE A boat arrives at the shore. During the following march, a troop of soldiers enters accompanied by townsmen and women. The afore mentioned. No. 8 - Chorus SOLDIERS A soldier's life for me! Every day a change of scene; Plenty today, little tomorrow, Now on land and now on sea. The sound of trumpets and fifes, The din of guns and shells Lend strength to our arms and our spirits, Longing only for victory. A soldier's life for me! Recitative DON ALFONSO There's no more time, friends: You must go where both Fate and duty call you. FIORDILIGI My love! DORABELLA My idol! FERRANDO My dearest! GUGLIELMO My life! FIORDILIGI Ah, for just a moment ... DON ALFONSO Your regiment's ship Has already left; You'll have to join it With a few friends who await you On a smaller boat. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Embrace me, my love! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA My heart is breaking! No. 9 - Quintet (and Chorus) FIORDILIGI weeping Swear that you'll write me Every day, my love! DORABELLA weeping Write me twice as often, if you can. GUGLIELMO Never doubt me, my dear! FERRANDO Rest assured, my love! DON ALFONSO to himself I'll burst if I don't laugh! FIORDILIGI Be true to me alone! DORABELLA Remain faithful! FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Farewell! My heart is rent in twain, my love. Farewell! Farewell! Farewell! During the repetition of the chorus, Ferrando and Guglielmo board the boat which then sails away. The soldiers march off, followed by the people. SIXTH SCENE Fiordiligi, Dorabella and Don Alfonso Recitative DORABELLA Where are they? DON ALFONSO They've gone. FIORDILIGI O most cruel, Bitter parting! DON ALFONSO Have courage, Dearest ladies; Look; in the distance Your lovers are waving. FIORDILIGI God speed you, my love! DORABELLA God speed you! FIORDILIGI O heavens! How swiftly their boat Disappears! It's gone already! It's out of sight! Heaven grant it A safe voyage! DORABELLA May Heaven protect them too On the field of battle! DON ALFONSO Preserve your lovers And my friends. No. 10 - Trio FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND DON ALFONSO Gentle be the breeze, Calm be the waves, And every element Smile in favour On their wish. Exeunt Fiordiligi and Dorabella SEVENTH SCENE Recitative DON ALFONSO I'm not a bad actor! Now then; The two champions Of Venus and Mars Await me at the appointed place; I must join them without delay. What grimaces, what affectations! All the better for me, They'll fall more easily; People of that kind are the first To change their minds. Poor fools, To wager a hundred sequins on a woman! "He who builds his hopes On a woman's heart Ploughs the sea And sows on sand And hopes to snare The wild wind in a net". EIGHTH SCENE A room with various chairs, a table, etc. Three doors: two at the sides, one centre. Recitative DESPINA who is whipping the chocolate What a wretched life A lady's maid leads! From morning till night working, Sweating and toiling, and after all One's done there's nothing for oneself! I've been beating this for half an hour, And now the chocolate's ready; yet though my tongue's Hanging out, must I just stand and smell it? Aren't my tastes just like yours? O dearest ladies, you have the substance And I only the smell! Damnit, I'm going to try it. She tastes it Delicious! She wipes her mouth Someone's coming! Goodness, it's my ladies! NINTH SCENE The afore?mentioned: Fiordiligi and Dorabella, who enter distractedly. Despina offers the chocolate on a tray. Recitative DESPINA Here's your breakfast, ladies. Dorabella flings it all to the ground Jiminy! What are you doing? FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Both stripping off all their ornaments. Ah! ah! DESPINA What's happened? FIORDILIGI Where is a dagger? DORABELLA Where is the poison? DESPINA Ladies, I beg you! DORABELLA Ah leave me! Flee the dread effect Of a distracted love! Close those windows; I hate the light, I hate the air I breathe, I hate myself. Who mocks at my grief? Who consoles me? Ah fly; leave me alone, for pity's sake! No. 11 - Aria DORABELLA Implacable pangs Which torment me, Do not subside Within my being Until my anguish Brings me death. If I remain alive I will furnish the Furies With a wretched example Of tragic love With the dreadful sound Of my sighs. Recitative DESPINA My lady Dorabella, My lady Fiordiligi, Tell me: what has happened? DORABELLA O dreadful disaster! DESPINA Get on with it! FIORDILIGI Our lovers Have left Naples. DESPINA laughing Is that all? They'll be back. DORABELLA Who knows! DESPINA What do you mean, who knows? Where have they gone? DORABELLA To the field of battle! DESPINA So much the better for them: You'll see them return crowned with laurel. FIORDILIGI But they might be killed! DESPINA Why then, So much the better for you. FIORDILIG rises angrily Fool, what are you saying? DESPINA The simple truth: you lose these two But all the rest are left. FIORDILIGI Ah, without Guglielmo, I think I'd die! DORABELLA Ah, without Ferrando I think I'd bury myself alive! DESPINA Splendid! That's what you think, but you wouldn't; No woman yet has ever died for love. Die for a man? There's lots more Where he came from. DORABELLA And do you believe anyone could love Another man who once had had A Guglielmo, a Ferrando for lover? DESPINA The others have everything That these have. You love this man now; So you'd love another: One's as good as the other Since neither's worth a thing. But we won't go into that; They're still alive And will come back alive; But they're far away, And rather than Waste time in idle tears, Think about enjoying yourselves. FIORDILIGI Enjoying ourselves? DESPINA Certainly! And what's more, Making love furiously, as your Dear gentlemen will be doing on active service! DORABELLA Don't insult those pure souls like this, Those models of fidelity and perfect love. DESPINA Go on with you! The times are past For spinning such tales even to babies! No. 12 - Aria DESPINA You look for fidelity In men, in soldiers? laughing Don't tell me that, for pity's sake! All of them Are made of the same stuff; The quivering leaves, The inconstant breezes Have more stability Than men. Crocodile tears, Lying looks, Deceiving words, False endearments Are the basis Of their tricks. In us they only prize Their own pleasure; Then they despise us, Deny us affection, And from such tyrants There's no mercy to be had. We woman should pay out This hurtful, Impudent breed In their own coin; Let's love them To suit our convenience and our vanity! All go out. TENTH SCENE Don Alfonso, later Despina Recitative DON ALFONSO How silent! What an air of sorrow These rooms wear! Poor dears! It's not really their fault; They need consolation; Until their two credulous lovers Appear disguised, As I instructed them, Let's see what can be done. I'm a bit worried about Despina; That little baggage might recognise them; She could upset the apple?cart. Let's see ? now's the time, If ever, to grease her palm; A tip works wonders with a ladies' maid. But to be certain, it might be best To let her into a part of the secret. That's a splendid idea! Here's her room. he knocks Despina dear! DESPINA Who's that? DON ALFONSO Oh! DESPINA Ih! she comes out DON ALFONSO Despina my dear, I have need of you. DESPINA Well, I haven't of you. DON ALFONSO I mean you well. DESPINA An old man like you Can do nothing for a girl. DON ALFONSO showing her a gold coin Drop your voice and look here! DESPINA Are you giving me it? DON ALFONSO Yes, if you'll do what I ask. DESPINA And what do you want? Gold is my undoing. DON ALFONSO And you shall have it If I can trust you. DESPINA Is that all? I'm ready. DON ALFONSO Take it, then; now listen. You know your mistresses Have lost their lovers. DESPINA I know. DON ALFONSO And you know Of all their weeping and wailing. DESPINA I know it all. DON ALFONSO All right: If, to console them A little and, as they say, To replace like with like, You were to find a way Of bringing to their favour Two presentable fellows Who are anxious to try - You take my meaning ? there's another Twenty scudi for you If you bring it off. DESPINA I've nothing against this proposition. But with those sillies ... Well, listen: These suitors of yours, Are they young? Are they handsome? And, above all, Have they plenty of money? DON ALFONSO They have everything Which could please ladies of taste. Do you want to see them? DESPINA Where are they? DON ALFONSO Just here: Shall I call them in? DESPINA That's all right with me. ELEVENTH SCENE The afore?mentioned ,Ferrando and Guglielmo; later Fiordiligi and Dorabella Don Alfonso brings in the lovers, who are disguised No. 13 - Sextet DON ALFONSO I present you, my friends, To pretty Miss Despina; The consolation of your heart Lies in her hands alone. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO By those hands, which with joy I kiss, By that smile so full of charm, Make my treasure turn on me Her clear and lovely eyes. DESPINA laughing, to herself What sights! What clothes! What faces! What moustaches! I wonder what they are – Wallachians or Turks. DON ALFONSO aside, to Despina What do you think of their appearance? DESPINA To be quite frank, They're exceptional In their ugliness, Enough to make one renounce love. FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO AND DON ALFONSO sotto voce Now the plan is quite decided; If she doesn't recognise us, There's no more need to fear. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA from within Oh Despina! Despina! DESPINA The ladies! DON ALFONSO to Despina Now's the moment! Use your wits: I'll hide in here. He hides FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA coming out of their rooms Impudent baggage! What are you doing with those people? Turn them out at once, Or you'll be as sorry for it as they. DESPINA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO All three kneel Ah, ladies, pardon! See at your lovely feet Two wretches languishing, Tortured with love by your beauty. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Great heavens! What do I hear? Who was the shameless instigator Of this vile betrayal? DESPINA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Pray calm your indignation! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA I can contain myself no more! My heart within my breast Is filled with outrage And with fear! DESPINA AND DON ALFONSO aside I'm a bit suspicious Of this rage and fury! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO aside What balm To this heart Is all this rage and fury! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA aside Forgive me, beloved; This heart of mine is innocent. Recitative DON ALFONSO from the doorway What a commotion! What a din! Whatever's this confusion? My dear ladies, Have you taken leave of your senses? Do you want to rouse the neighbourhood? What's the matter? What is it? DORABELLA angrily Heavens! See: Men in our house! DON ALFONSO not looking at them What's wrong with that? FIORDILIGI with spirit What's wrong? On this day, After our tragic loss? DON ALFONSO Gracious! Am I awake or dreaming? My friends, my dearest friends! You here? What? Why? When? How? Ye gods! I'm delighted! aside, to Ferrando and Guglielmo Play up to me. FERRANDO Our friend Don Alfonso! GUGLIELMO Our dear friend! They embrace eagerly DON ALFONSO What a pleasant surprise! DESPINA Do you know them? DON ALFONSO Know them? They are the dearest friends I have in this world, And will be yours too. FIORDILIGI But what are they doing in my house? GUGLIELMO Here at your feet, ladies, are Two miscreants, two culprits! It was love ... DORABELLA Ye gods, what do I hear? FERRANDO It was love, that powerful god, Who drew us here in search of you. GUGLIELMO No sooner having glimpsed The light of your dazzling eyes ... FERRANDO ... than at their bright sparks ... GUGLIELMO ... like moths tormented by desire ... FERRANDO ... we flew before you ... GUGLIELMO … and round you and behind you ... FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO … to implore your pity in plaintive accents. FIORDILIGI Heavens, what presumption! DORABELLA Sister, what shall we do? FIORDILIGI Begone, bold creatures! Leave this house! Despina goes out, in a fright. And with the unwelcome breath of base words Do not profane our hearts, Our ears and our affections! In vain do you, or others, seek to seduce Our souls; the unsullied faith which We plighted to our dear loves We shall know bow to preserve for them Until death, despite the world and fate. No. 14 - Aria FIORDILIGI Like a rock standing impervious To winds and tempest, So stands my heart ever strong In faith and love. Between us we have kindled A flame which warms And consoles us, And death alone could Change my heart's devotion. Respect this example Of constancy, You abject creatures, And do not let a base hope Make you so rash again! The ladies make to go. Ferrando detains one, Guglielmo the other. Recitative FERRANDO Ah, do not go! GUGLIELMO Cruel one, stay! to Don Alfonso What do you say now? DON ALFONSO Just wait. In charity to me, my dears, Don't put me more out of countenance. DORABELLA angrily And what do you expect? DON ALFONSO Oh, nothing! But it seems to me ... That a scrap of courtesy ... After all, they are gentlemen And they are friends of mine, FIORDILIGI So! And I should listen ... ? GUGLIELMO To our sufferings and take pity on them! The heavenly beauty of your eyes Opened a wound in ours That the salve of love Alone can cure. Open your heart for a moment To its sweet words, my beauties; You'll see before you the most faithful of lovers. No. 15 - Aria GUGLIELMO Be not wayward, Dear beguiling eyes; Let two loving lightning flashes Strike for a moment here. Make us happy, And love with us; And we will make you in return The happiest of women. Look at us, Touch us, Take stock of us: We're crazy but we're charming, We're strong and well made, And as anyone can see, Whether by merit or by chance, We've good feet, Good eyes, good noses. Look, good feet; note, good eyes; Touch, good noses; take stock of us; And these moustaches Could be called Manly triumphs, The plumage of love. Fiordiligi and Dorabella exeunt. TWELFTH SCENE Ferrando, Guglielmo and Don Alfonso No. 16 - Trio FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO No sooner alone with Don Alfonso than they burst into laughter. DON ALFONSO So you're laughing? FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Of course we're laughing. DON ALFONSO But what's the matter? FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Oh, we know. DON ALFONSO Don't laugh so loudly. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO You can save your breath. DON ALFONSO If they heard you, If they found you out, The whole thing Would be ruined. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO How can I Keep from laughing ... I feel as though I'm going to burst! DON ALFONSO Their laughter Makes me laugh too though I know It's bound to end in tears. Recitative DON ALFONSO And may I ask to know The reason for this laughter? GUGLIELMO Oh what a face! Don't you think, my dear sir, That we have good cause? FERRANDO mockingly How much will you pay, And we'll drop our wager? GUGLIELMO mockingly Pay half. FERRANDO Well let you off with twenty?four sequins. DON ALFONSO Poor little innocents! Come here; I'll give you My little finger to suck on. GUGLIELMO And you still have The courage to go on? DON ALFONSO Before evening We'll talk of this. FERRANDO Whenever you like. DON ALFONSO Meanwhile Silence and obedience. Until tomorrow morning. GUGLIELMO We are soldiers And accept discipline. DON ALFONSO Very well: both of you go And wait for me in the garden: There I'll give you your orders. GUGLIELMO But don't we eat today? FERRANDO What's it matter? When the battle's over Our supper will taste the better. No. 17 - Aria FERRANDO A breath of love From our treasures Will afford our hearts Sweet sustenance. A heart nourished On the hope of love Has no need Of greater inducement. Exeunt Ferrando and Guglielmo. THIRTEENTH SCENE Don Alfonso, later Despina Recitative DON ALFONSO It's quite absurd! There are So few constant women in this world, And here are two of them! It can't be. enter Despina Come here, diild, and tell me Where your mistresses are and what they're doing. DESPIN The poor fools Are standing in the garden Bewailing the loss of their lovers To the breezes and the mosquitos. DON ALFONSO And how do you think This will end? Can we hope They'll come to their senses? DESPINA Well, I would; Where they weep, I'd laugh. To choke with despair Because a lover goes away! Have you ever seen such folly! If one goes, take two others. DON ALFONSO Well said! that's sense. to himself I'd better compliment her. DESPINA It's a law of nature, and not Merely sense. What is love? Pleasure, convenience, taste, Enjoyment, amusement, Pastime, fun, it's no longer love If it becomes a burden and Instead of pleasure brings pain and torment. DON ALFONSO But meanwhile our sillies ... DESPINA They'll do What we say. It's good that they should know They're loved by them. DON ALFONSO They know it. DESPINA Then they'll re?admit them, They'll spin the usual tale, And devil take the hindmost! DON ALFONSO But how can you bring them back Now they've gone, and make These tiger?cats of yours Listen to them again and let themselves be tempted? DESPINA Leave me the bother Of running the show. When Despina runs something It can't fail: I've already led A thousand men by the nose: I should know how to manage two women. Are your two whiskered monsieurs rich? DON ALFONSO Rolling in it. DESPINA Where are they? DON ALFONSO In the street, Waiting for me. DESPINA Then off you go And bring them to me here By the little door; I'll wait for you in my room. If you'll do all I tell you, Before tomorrow your friends Will win the day: they'll have their way, And I'll have the glory. Exeunt. FOURTEENTH SCENE A pretty garden. Two grassy banks at the sides. No. 18 - Finale FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Ah, how my lot has changed All in a moment! Ah, what a sea of torment Is life henceforth for me! So long as the cruel stars Left my dear one with me, I knew not what grief was, I knew not what it was to pine. FIFTEENTH SCENE The afore?mentioned; Ferrando, Guglielmo, Don Alfonso; later Despina FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO off?stage Let us die, yes, let us die And thus melt their hard hearts. DON ALFONSO off?stage There is yet a hope: I beg you, do not do it! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Goodness, what terrible cries! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Let me be! DON ALFONSO Wait! Ferrando and Gugliemo, each carrying a phial, enter followed by Don Alfonso. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO May arsenic set me free From such cruelty! They drink and throw down the containers; the two women turn and see them. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Heavens, was that poison? DON ALFONSO Poison good and proper, That in a few moments Will deprive them of their lives! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA The tragic sight Turns my heart to ice. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Draw near, cruel ones; See the dire effect Of despairing love And at least pity us. ALL May the sun's rays Be darkened for me! I tremble, I feel The very fibres of my being failing, And my tongue and lips Cannot form a word. Ferrando and Guglielmo fall on the grassy banks. DON ALFONSO Since these unfortunates Are near to death, At least try to show them A little pity. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Help, someone, come quickly O Heaven, can no one hear! Despina! DESPINA off?stage Did someone call? FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Despina! DESPINA entering What do I see? I fear the poor things are dead, Or very near to dying! DON ALFONSO Alas, only too true! Distraught, despairing, They have taken poison! Oh strange love! DESPINA It would be shameful of you To forsake these unhappy wretches. You must aid them. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND DON ALFONSO Whatever can we do? DESPINA They still show signs of life; Give them a little comfort From your kindly hands. to Don Alfonso You hurry away with me And we'll seek A doctor and an antidote. Despina and Don Alfonso exeunt FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA What a tribulation! No more dreadful situation Could ever be imagined! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO aside No more farcical comedy Could ever be imagined! Ah! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA standing away from the men The poor dears are sighing! FIORDILLGI What shall we do? DORABELLA You suggest something. FIORDILIGI At a moment So painful Who could forsake them? DORABELLA approaching a little Their faces are quite interesting! FIORDILIGI approaching a little We could go a little further. DORABELLA His head is very cold. FIORDILIGI This one's cold as ice. DORABELLA And his pulse? FIORDILIGI I can't feel it. DORABELLA This one's beating very slowly. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Oh, if help is long in coming, There'll be no more hope of life! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO softly Both have become Calmer and more gentle; We shall see if their pity Will turn into love. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Poor dears! Their death Would fill me with grief. SIXTEENTH SCENE The afore?mentioned; Despina disguised as a doctor, Don Alfonso DON ALFONSO Here's the doctor, Gentle ladies! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO aside Despina dressed up! How heavily she's disguised! DESPINA "Salvete, amabiles, Bonae puellae!" FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA He speaks a language We do not understand. DESPINA Let's speak, then, As you command me. I know Greek and Arabic, Turkish and the Vandal tongue; And I can speak Swabian and Tartar too. DON ALFONSO Keep all these languages For yourself, sir; For the moment, Look at these poor fellows; They've taken poison; What can be done? FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Yes, doctor, What can be done? DESPINA feeling the pulse and forehead of each First I must know The nature of this potion And the reason it was taken; Whether it was swallowed Hot or cold, A little or much, In one draught Or in several. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND DON ALFONSO They took arsenic, Good doctor, And drank it here. The cause was love And they swallowed it In a single gulp. DESPINA Don't worry, Don't be afraid; Here is an earnest Of my skill. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA He's taken a piece Of iron in his hand. DESPINA This is A piece of magnet, The stone which the great Doctor Mesmer discovered In Germany And then became So famous in France. She touches the heads of the feigned invalids with the magnet and gently draws it the length of their bodies. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND DON ALFONSO Look, they're moving, Twisting, shaking! They'll hit their heads On the ground in a moment. DESPINA Ah, hold their foreheads Steady, will you? FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA We're standing ready! DESPINAHold tight. Courage! Now they Are safe from death. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND DON ALFONSO They're looking round And recovering their strength. Ah, this doctor's Worth all the gold in Peru! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO rising to their feet Where am I? What place is this? Who is he? Who are they? Am I before Jove's throne? Are you Pallas or Cytherea? Ferrando to Fiordiligi and Guglielmo to Dorabella No, you are my fair goddess! I recognise you by That sweet face, And by that hand I now know so well; It is my only treasure. They embrace the girls tenderly and kiss their hands. DESPINA AND DON ALFONSO It's the effect of the poison still; Don't be afraid. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA That may be so, but such liberties Do violence to our reputation. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO to Fiordiligi and Dorabella I beg you, my adored one, Turn your lovely eyes on me. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA I can resist no longer! DESPINA AND DON ALFONSO Very soon now you'll see, By virtue of magnetism's power, The end of this paroxysm, And they'll be as they were before. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO aside My lungs are bursting With the need to laugh. aloud Give me a kiss, my treasure, One single kiss, or else I die. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Heavens, a kiss? DESPINA Agree, As an act of kindness! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA This is too much to ask Of a chaste and faithful woman! It's an outrage to my love, It's an outrage to my heart! DESPINA, FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO AND DON ALFONSO aside A more amusing picture Can't be found in all the world; That which makes me laugh the most Is their rage and fury. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Despairing or poisoned, Go to the devil, The lot of you, Truly you'll repent too late If you anger me more! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO aside I don't know if their rage And fury are feigned or real, But wouldn't wish this fire To end in the fire of love. DESPINA AND DON ALFONSO aside I know full well this fire Will change to that of love. SECOND ACT FIRST SCENE A room Fiordiligi, Dorabella and Despina Recitative DESPINA Upon my word, you're The strangest pair of creatures! FIORDILIGI You jade! What are your after? DESPINA For me, nothing. FIORDILIGI For whom, then? DESPINA For you. DORABELLA For us? DESPINA For you. Are you women or not? FIORDILIGI What do you mean? DESPINA I mean, You should act like women, then. DORABELLA And how is that? DESPINA Treat love lightly. Never neglect an opportunity; Change at the right moment, Sometimes be constant, Flirt with charm, Foresee the misfortune so common To those who trust in men, Have your cake and eat it too. FIORDILIGI You minx! That's what You'd do if you had the chance. DESPINA That's what I do now. But I wish that you too Would do the same For the glory of the fair sex; For example, your gallants Have gone off to the wars: till they return, Act like the army: go recruiting! DORABELLA Heaven protect us. DESPINA Oh, we're on earth and not in heaven! Trust in my zeal. Since these strangers adore you, Let them do so. They're rich, handsome, Well?born, generous, as Don Alfonso Guaranteed you; they had the courage To die for you; these are virtues Not to be despised by ladies Such as you, of beauty and fashion, Who can do without love but not without lovers. to herself I think they're coming round. FIORDILIGI Indeed, you'd have us Acting very strangely. Do you think we want to be The talk of all the gossips? Do you think we want to cause Such anguish to our loved ones? DESPINA And who says You'd he doing them any harm? DORABELLA Don't you consider It would be harm enough If word got round That we were entertaining them? DESPINA As for that, there's A perfectly safe method; I'll spread it abroad That they're after me. DORABELLA Who'd believe that? DESPINA Oh thank you! Hasn't a maid The right to have a couple of followers? You can trust in me. F1ORDILIGI No, no; these strangers of yours Are too bold. Didn't they even go so far As to ask for kisses? DESPINA to herself How shocking! aloud I can assure you That all the things they did Were the fault of the poison which they took: Convulsions, deliriums, Delusions, ravings: But now you'll see how mild they are, Well?behaved, modest and gentle. Let them come back. DORABELLA And then? DESPINA And then? Bless us, get on with it. to herself I said they'd fall! FIORDILIGI What should we do? DESPINA Whatever you want. Are you flesh and blood, Or what? No. 19 - Aria DESPINA At fifteen a woman Should know the ways of the world, Where the devil keeps his tail, What's right and what is wrong. She should know the wiles That ensnare lovers, How to feign laughter or tears And to make up good excuses. At one and the same moment She must listen to a hundred But speak with her eyes To a thousand, Hold out hope to all, Be they handsome or plain, Know how to hide things Without getting flustered, Know how to tell lies Without ever blushing. And, like a queen On her lofty throne, Get her own way With „I can“ and „I will“ aside It seems they're taking To this doctrine; Hooray for Despina, She knows how to do it. exit SECOND SCENE Fiordiligi and Dorabella Recitative FIORDILIGI Sister, what do you say? DORABELLA I'm dumbfounded At the fiendish ideas of that girl. FIORDILIGI Believe me, she's crazy. Do you think we could possibly Follow her counsel? DORABELLA Of course, if you stood everything Upside down. FIORDILIGI On the contrary, I'm standing things The right way up: Don't you think it wrong For two young women who are betrothed To do such things? DORABELLA She's not saying We should do any harm. FIORDILIGI It' bad enough Getting ourselves talked about! DORABELLA But if it's said They've come to see Despina! FIORDILIGI Your conscience is too elastic! What will our menfolk say? DORABELLA Nothing;Either they'll not know about it And it's over and done with, Or they'll hear something, And then we'll say They came to see her. FIORDILIGI But our hearts? DORABELLA Will stay as they are; To amuse ourselves a little And not to die of boredom Is not to be false, My dear sister. FIORDILIGI That's true. DORABELLA So? FIORDILIGI So you go ahead: But I don't want to be involved If there should be a scandal. DORABELLA How can there be a scandal When we're taking such precautions? However, listen, let's come to an agreement: Which of these two Narcissi do you fancy for yourself? FIORDILIGI You choose, sister. DORABELLA I've already chosen. No. 20 - Duet DORABELLA I'll take the dark one, Who seems to me more fun. FIORDILIGI And meantime I'll laugh And joke a bit with the fair one. DORABELLA Playfully I'll answer His sweet words. FIORDILIGI Sighing, I'll imitate The other's sighs. DORABELLA He'll say to me: My love, I'm dying! FIORDILIGI He'll say to me: My dearest treasure! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA And meanwhile What sport and pleasure I shall have! THIRD SCENE The afore?mentioned and Don Alfonso Recitative DON ALFONSO Come, make haste to the garden, Dear young ladies! What fun! What music! Such singing! What a brilliant sight! What magic! Come along, quickly! DORABELLA Whatever's going on? DON ALFONSO You'll soon see. FOURTH SCENE A garden by the seashore, with garden seats and two small stone tables. At the landing stage is a barge decorated with flowers. Ferrando and Guglielmo in the barge, with singers and musicians; Despina in the garden; Fiordiligi and Dorabella, accompanied by Don Alfonso, come in from one side. Richly attired servants, etc. No. 21 - Duet (with Chorus) FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Ye friendly breezes, Help, o help my desires And carry my sighs To the goddess of my heart. Repeat, you who at thousand times Have heard the tenor of my griefs, All that you have heard To my beloved. CHORUS Ye friendly breezes, Help the longings of their dear hearts, Recitative DON ALFONSO to the servants carrying baskets of flowers Set all those down On these tables, my lads, And then return to the barge. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA What is this masquerade? DESPINA Come now, courage! Have you lost your tongues? The barge leaves the shore. FERRANDO I tremble and quake From head to foot. GUGLIELMO Love binds the limbs of a true lover. DON ALFONSO Give them a word of encouragement. FIORDILIGI to the suitors Speak then. DORABELLA Say frankly what it is you want. FERRANDO My lady! GUGLIELMO Rather, my ladies! FERRANDO You do the talking. GUGLIELMO No, no, you do it. DON ALFONSO The devil take it! Do stop this absurd Old?fashioned nonsense. Despina, let's get this over; You act for one side while I act for the other. No. 22 - Quartet DON ALFONSO taking Dorabella by the hand Give me your hand, And come this way a little. to the suitors If you won't speak, I'll speak up for you. A trembling slave Implores your pardon; He offended you, he sees, Though only for a moment; Now he repents in silence ... FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO In silence ... DON ALFONSO Now he leaves you in peace ... FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO In peace . . . DON ALFONSO He can't do what he wants to, He would do what he can. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO He can't do what he wants to, He would do what he can. DON ALFONSO Now come, give them an answer; You just look on and laugh? DESPINA I'll give them an answer For you. to the ladies What's done is done, Least said, soonest mended. So let the knot, the sign Of servitude, be broken. Give me your arm, And sigh no more. DESPINA AND DON ALFONSO softly, aside Let's go, for mercy's sake; We'll watch what they will do. I'll rank them higher than the devil If they don't give way now. exeunt FIFTH SCENE Fiordiligi, Dorabella, Ferrando and Guglielmo Recitative FIORDILIGI What a lovely day! FERRANDO Perhaps a trifle hot. DORABELLA What pretty bushes! GUGLIELMO Yes, yes, very pretty; They've more leaves than fruit. FIORDILIGI How charming These paths are! Shall we take a stroll? FERRANDO Your slightest wish Is my command. FIORDILIGI You are too kind! FERRANDO to Guglielmo, as he passes This is the big moment! FIORDILIGI What did you say to him? FERRANDO Er ... I told him To keep her entertained. DORABELLA Let us go for a stroll too. GUGLIELMO Just as you please. They stroll. Oh dear! DORABELLA What's the matter? GUGLIELMO I feel so bad, My dearest one, That I think I'm going to die. DORABELLA to herself This simply won't do. aloud It'll be the after?effects Of the poison that you drank. GUGLIELMO Ah, I drink in A for stronger poison From the cruel, fiery Volcanoes of love! Fiordiligi goes out with Ferrando. DORABELLA It'll be a burning poison; Cool yourself a little. GUGLIELMO Unkind one, you mock me While I'm dying. to himself They've vanished; Where the devil have they got to? DORABELLA Oh, don't do that. GUGLIELMO I'm dying, cruel one, and you mock me? DORABELLA I mock you? GUGLIELMO Then give me, light of my life, Some token of your pity. DORABELLA Two, if you like. Tell me what you'd have, and we'll see. GUGLIELMO to himself Is she joking or in earnest? aloud Deign to accept This humble offering. DORABELLA A heart? GUGLIELMO Yes, a heart; the symbol of that one Which burns, pines and longs for you. DORABELLA to herself What a precious gift! GUGLIELMO Will you accept it? DORABELLA Cruel man, Do not seek to tempt a faithful heart. GUGLIELMO to himself The mountain is weakening. I don't like this, but I've pledged My honour as a soldier. to Dorabella I adore you! DORABELLA I beg of you! GUGLIELMO I am all yours. DORABELLA O Heavens! GUGLIELMO Give in, my dear one! DORABELLA You'll drive me to my death! GUGLIELMO We'll die together then, My hope and love. Will you accept it? DORABELLA with a sigh I accept. GUGLIELMO to himself Poor Ferrando! aloud Oh what joy! No. 23 - Duet GUGLIELMO This heart I give you, My adored one; But I want yours in return; Come, give it me. DORABELLA You've given it and I take it, But mine I cannot give; In vain you ask it of me, It is no longer mine. GUGLIELMO If you no longer own it, Why does it beat here? DORABELLA If you gave me it, What is still beating there? DORABELLA AND GUGLIELMO It is my own dear heart That is no longer mine; It's come to lodge with you, And that's what's beating so. GUGLIELMO trying to put the heart where she has the miniature of her lover Let me put it here. DORABELLA There it cannot stay. GUGLIELMO I understand, you little rogue. He gently turns her face away, takes out the miniature and puts in the heart. DORABELLA What are you doing? GUGLIELMO You're not to look. DORABELLA to herself I feel I have A volcano in my bosom! GUGLIELMO to himself Poor Ferrando! It doesn't seem possible. aloud Now turn your pretty eyes on me. DORABELLA What do you want? GUGLIELMO See, Doesn't that look better? DORABELLA AND GUGLIELMO Oh happy exchange Of hearts and affections! What new delights! What sweet pain! They go out arm in arm. SIXTH SCENE Fiordiligi enters in agitation, followed by Ferrando Recitative FERRANDO Unkind one! Why do you fly me? FIORDILIGI I've seen an asp, A hydra, a basilisk! FERRANDO Ah, cruel one, I understand you! The asp, the hydra, the basilisk And all that's fiercest in the Libyan desert You see in me alone. FIORDILIGI Ah yes, it's true! You would rob me of my peace. FERRANDO Only to make you happy. FIORDILIGI Molest me no further! FERRANDO I ask but for a glance. FIORDILIGI Leave me! FERRANDO How can I, until you turn on me An eye less haughty? O Heaven! But you look at me and sigh? exit SEVENTH SCENE Recitative FIORDILIGI alone He's left me ... listen ... Ah no! Let him go. Let my sight be free of the unlucky object Of my weakness. To what a pass This cruel man has brought me! This is a just reward for my sins! Was this the time For me to heed the sighs Of a new lover, to make sport Of another's sighs? Ah, rightly You condemn this heart, o just love! I burn, and my ardour is no longer The outcome of a virtuous love: It is madness, Anguish, remorse, repentance Fickleness, deceit and betrayal! No. 25 - Rondo FIORDILIGI In pity's name, my dearest, forgive The misdeed of a loving soul; Oh God, it shall evermore be hidden Among these shady bushes. My courage, my constancy Will drive away this dishonourable desir And banish the memory Which fills me with shame and horror. And who is it whom This unworthy heart has betrayed? Dear heart, your trust deserved A better reward! Exit EIGHTH SCENE Ferrando and Guglielmo Recitative FERRANDO in high spirits We've won, my boy! GUGLIELMO Two of a kind? FERRANDO A straight flush! Fiordiligi is modesty incarnate. GUGLIELMO Not a crack? FERRANDO Not one: just wait And listen to what happened. GUGLIELMO I'm listening: tell me. FERRANDO We went for a stroll In the garden, As we'd agreed: I gave her my arm, We chatted of nothing in particular; At last we came to the subject of love. GUGLIELMO Go on. FERRANDO I feigned a stammer, I pretended to weep, I swore I'd die at her feet. GUGLIELMO Very clever, I grant. And she? FERRANDO At first she laughed, Joked and teased me. GUGLIELMO And then? FERRANDO Then she pretended To melt a little. GUGLIELMO Oh, did she? FERRANDO Then the bomb exploded. She was keeping herself pure as a dove For her dear Guglielmo: Haughtily she repulsed me, Upbraided me, fled me, Giving me evidence and proof That she's a woman without equal. GUGLIELMO Good for you, good for me, Good for my Penelope! Let me embrace you For your happy tidings, My faithful Mercury! FERRANDO And my Dorabella, How did she behave? Oh, I haven't a doubt of her. enthusiastically I know so well Her sensitive soul. GUGLIELMO Well, just between ourselves, If you had a doubt It might not be such a bad thing. FERRANDO What? GUGLIELMO Oh, don't take me seriously. to himself I'd like to gild the pill for him, FERRANDO Speak out! Did she perhaps Fall for your flatteries? Ah, if I could even suspect it! GUGLIELMO In this world It's always wise to be a bit suspicious. FERRANDO Ye immortal gods! Speak out! Don't roast me on a slow fire; But no, you're making sport of me; She loves me, adores me alone. GUGLIELMO Certainly! And so in proof Of her love and devotion She gave me this little picture. FERRANDO in a fury My portrait! The traitress! he makes to go GUGLIELMO Where are you going? FERRANDO To tear her heart from her wicked bosom And avenge the betrayal of my love. GUGLIELMO Stop! FERRANDO with determination No, let me go! GUGLIELMO Are you raving? Would you ruin yourself For a worthless woman? to himself I wouldn't want him To commit some folly! FERRANDO Ye gods! All those promises, And tears, and sighs, and vows How could the inhuman creature Forget them so soon? GUGLIELMO I'm sure I don't know. FERRANDO What should I do now? To what course, What plan apply myself? Take pity on me, give me your counsel. GUGLIELMO My friend, I don't know How to advise you. FERRANDO Cruel! Heartless In a day! In a few hours! GUGLIELMO It's certainly something to wonder at. No. 26 - Aria GUGLIELMO Ladies, you treat so many thus That, if I must speak the truth, I begin to sympathise When your lovers complain. I adore the sex, you know, Everyone knows it; Each day I show it And always take your part. But such treatment of so many Discourages me, in truth. A thousand times I've drawn my sword To defend your honour. A thousand times I've championed you With my tongue and, still more, with my heart. But such treatment of so many Is pernicious and a bore. You're attractive, you are charming, Heaven has given you treasures galore And graces envelop you From head to foot. But thus you treat so many, That it's difficult to believe, And if your lovers complain They have good reason indeed. exit NINTH SCENE Ferrando alone, later Don Alfonso and Gu glielmo talking in the background Recitative FERRANDO In what fierce strife, In what confusion Of thoughts and affections I find myself! So unusual and novel is my situation That neither others nor I myself Suffice to give me counsel ... oh, Alfonso, How you must be laughing At my stupidity! But I'll be revenged, I'll banish The traitress from my mind ... Banish her? O Heaven, too loudly my heart intercedes for her. No. 27 - Cavatina FERRANDO Betrayed and scorned By her faithless heart, I still know That my soul adores her, I still hear The voice of love for her. Recitative DON ALFONSO Bravo, that's true fidelity. FERRANDO Get away, you tormentor. It's through you I'm suffering. DON ALFONSO Come, if you're sensible Your old calm will return. Listen: pointing to Guglielmo Fiordiligi has remained Faithful to Guglielmo, But Dorabella's unfaithful to you. FERRANDO To my shame. GUGLIELMO Dear friend, one must Make distinctions in everything. Do you imagine a woman could Fail a Guglielmo? Speaking in all modesty, Make a small comparison Between us ... you see, my friend, There's a little extra something ... DON ALFONSO Yes, that's what I say. GUGLIELMO So meantime you can pay me Those fifty sequins. DON ALFONSO Willingly; But before I do so, I'd like us To try another experiment. GUGLIELMO What's that? DON ALFONSO Have patience; until tomorrow You are both at my command; You gave me your words as soldiers To do what I said. Come, I hope To show you how foolish it is To count your chickens before they're hatched. exeunt TENTH SCENE A room with several doors, a mirror and a table Dorabella and Despina, later Fiordiligi Recitative DESPINA Now I can see You're a woman of sense. DORABELLA In vain, Despina, I tried to resist: That little devil has such tricks, Such eloquence, such a way with him, That he'd melt the heart of a stone. DESPINA Saints above! That's really something! It's so rarely we poor girls Get the chance of something good That we must grab it when it comes. But here's your sister. What a face she's pulling! FIORDILIGI You wretches! See what a state I'm in, And all through you! DESPINA What's the matter, My poor madame? DORABELLA Is something wrong, sister? FIORDILIGI The devil's in me; let him take me, You two, Don Alfonso, the strangers And all the other fools in the world. DORABELLA Have you lost your senses? FIORDILIGI Worse, much worse. Recail from me: I'm in love, And my love isn't just for Guglielmo. DESPINA That's better, much better! DORABELLA And perhaps you too have fallen In love with the fair gallant? FIORDILIGI sighing Ah only too deeply! DESPINA Well, hooray! DORABELLA Take seventy thousand kisses: You for the fair one, I for the dark one, And there we are, both married! FIORDILIGI What are you saying? Don't you spare a thought for the unfortunates Who left us this morning? For their grief? Have you forgotten their faithfulness? Where, where did you learn Such barbarous feelings? How have you so changed your nature? DORABELLA Listen: are you sure That our former lovers won't be killed In the war? What then? We'll both be left high and dry. There's always a big difference Between one in the hand and one in the bush. FIORDILIGI And then if they come back? DORABELLA If they come back, too bad for them! We'll be married by then And far away from here. FIORDILIGI Well, I'd like to know bow one can Change one's affections in a single day. DORABELLA What a silly question! We're women! And how have you behaved? FIORDILIGI I can control myself. DESPINA You can't, I bet. FIORDILIGI I'll show you. DORABELLA Believe me, sister, you'd best give in. No. 28 - Aria DORABELLA Love is a little thief, A little serpent Is he. According to his whim The heart finds peace Or no. Scarcely does he open a path Between your eyes and your bosom Than he chains your soul And takes away your liberty. He'll bring sweetness and content, If you give him his way, But will make your lot heavy If you try to deny him. If he visits your breast And plucks at you there, Do all that he asks, As I will do too. Dorabella and Despina go out. ELEVENTH SCENE Fiordiligi alone, then Guglielmo, Ferrando and Don Alfonso in another room which can be seen through the door of the first, later Despina Recitative FIORDILIGI How everything conspires to tempt My heart! But no! Let me die rather than yield! I was wrong to confess my feelings To my sister and my servant. They'll tell him all, and he'll be bolder, Carrying all before him; my eyes must not Fall on him again! I'll threaten All the servants with dismissal If they let him in; I will not see That seducer. GUGLIELMO Well spoken, my chaste Diana! Did you hear her? FIORDILIGI But perhaps Dorabella, Without my knowledge ... Sofily, a thought comes to mind; In the house are several uniforms Of Guglielmo's and Ferrando's: courage now! Despina! Despina! DESPINA entering What is it? FIORDILIGI Take this key, and without any questions Or any back answers, Go to the wardrobe and bring me here Two swords, two helmets and two tunics Of our lovers. DESPINA What do you want with them? FIORDILIGI Go on, and no back answers. DESPINA to herself Milady's on her high horse! exit FIORDILIGI There's nothing else to do: I hope Dorabella herself Will follow a good example: Away, away! No other way is left For us to preserve our honour. DON ALFONSO to himself I've heard enough. to Despina, who is returning Go on, don't be afraid. DESPINA Here I am. FIORDILIGI Now go. Send a servant at once To order six post?horses; Tell Dorabella I want to speak her. DESPINA Very good, ma'am. to herself I think she's out of her mind. exit TWELFTH SCENE Fiordiligi, then Ferrando: Guglielmo and Don Alfonso remain in the other room Recitative FIORDILIGI Ferrando's uniform will fit me; Dorabella can take Guglielmo's. In these outfits We'll join our sweethearts, We can fight beside them And die, if need be. She throws off her head?dress. Out with you, fatal finery, I despise you. GUGLIELMO to himself Could there be a love like this? FIORDILIGI You shall never deck my head again Till I return here with my true love; In your place I do this helmet. How it transforms my whole appearance! I can hardly recognise myself! No. 29 - Duet FIORDILIGI Very soon now I'll be enfolded In the embraces of my true love; Unrecognised in these garments I will come before him. Oh, what joy will fill his heart When he sees me again! FERRANDO And meanwhile I, left wretched, Shall die of grief. FIORDILIGI What do I see? I am betrayed! Oh leave me! FERRANDO Ah no, dear heart! With this sword in your hand Strike me to the heart, And if you lack the strength, By Heaven, I'll guide your hand myself. FIORDILIGI Alas, be silent! I am Tormented and unhappy enough! Ah, now my constancy Begins to falter Before his looks and his words! FERRANDO Ah, now her constancy Begins to falter Before my looks and my words! FIORDILIGI Get up, I beg! FERRANDO It cannot be. FIORDILIG1 In pity's name, what do you ask of me? FERRANDO Your heart or my death. FIORDILIGI My strength is giving out! FERRANDO Yield, my dearest! FIORDILIGI Heaven, direct me! FERRANDO Turn a merciful eye on me. In me alone you'll find Husband, lover and more, if you wish. Delay no longer, my adored one. FIORDILIGI Merciful heaven! Cruel man, you've won! Do with me what you will. Don Alfonso holds back Guglielmo who tries to leap forward. FERRANDO AND FIORDILIGI Embrace me, my dearest, And may the consolation for our sorrows Be to spend our time in sweet affection, And sigh For joy! exeunt THIRTEENTH SCENE Guglielmo and Don Alfonso, then Ferrando, later Despina Recitative GUGLIELMO Alas, poor me, what have I seen! What have I heard! DON ALFONSO Keep quiet, for heaven's sake! GUGLIELMO I'll pluck out my beard, I'll tear my flesh, And charge the stars with my horns! So that was Fiordiligi, my Penelope, The chaste Diana of the age! Strumpet, Assassin, cheat, swindler, bitch! DON ALFONSO Let him get it off his chest. FERRANDO entering Well! GUGLIELMO Where is she? FERRANDO Who? Your Fiordiligi? GUGLIELMO My Fior ... Furies of hell! Strangle first her and then me! FERRANDO You see now; There are distinctions in everything; ironically There's a little extra something ... GUGLIELMO Stop it! Stop Taunting me, and instead Let's find a way Of punishing them soundly. DON ALFONSO I know what to do: marry them. GUGLIELMO I'd rather marry Charon's boat. FERRANDO Vulcan's smithy. GUGLIELMO The gates of hell. DON ALFONSO Then you'll stay bachelors for ever. FERRANDO Are there no women Fit for men like us? DON ALFONSO There's not so many. But what would they do, If these act like this? At bottom, you still love These plucked birds. GUGLIELMO Alas, it's true! FERRANDO Too true! DON ALFONSO Well then, take them as they are: Nature can't make exceptions And create two women of a different stuff Just to suit your tastes: in such matters You must be philosophical. Come along then; Let's find a way Of putting things together. Tonight I still want to see A double wedding; Meanwhile listen to my song: Take heed, and you'll be happy. No. 30 - Andante DON ALFONSO Everyone blames women, but I forgive them If they change their love A thousand times a day; Some call it a sin, others a habit, But I say it's a necessity of their heart. The lover who finds that he's been deceived Should blame not others But his own mistake; Whether they're young or old, fair or plain – Repeat with me: Women are all the same! FOURTEENTH SCENE The afore?mentioned; Despina Recitative DESPINA Victory, gentlemen! The dear ladies are disposed To marry you; in your name I promised that in about three days' time They'd go away with you: They ordered me to find a notary To draw up the contract; They're waiting for you in their room. Are you satisfied with that? FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO AND DON ALFONSO Most satisfied. DESPINA When Despina takes a job in hand She always gets results. exeunt FIFTEENTH SCENE A salon brilliantly lit. An orchestra in the background: a table laid for four persons, with silver candlesticks. Four richly clad servants. Despina, servants and musicians; then Don Alfonso No. 31 - Finale DESPINA Be quick about it, friends, Light the torches And prepare the table In style for the nobility. The marriage of our mistresses Is already arranged, And you must take your places As soon as the bridegrooms appear. CHORUS OF SERVANTS AND MUSICIANS Let's be quick about it, friends, Light the torches And prepare the table In style for the nobility. DON ALFONSO Well done! Splendid! What abundance! What elegance! You'll all be given A suitable reward. Now the two couples are arriving; Applaud them as they enter: Let cheerful song and merry music Fill the air with gaiety. DESPINA AND DON ALFONSO soflly, leaving by different doors A prettier piece of comedy There never was, nor ever will be! SIXTEENTH SCENE The afore?mentioned: Fiordiligi, Dorabella, Ferrando, Guglielmo CHORUS Blessed be the two bridegrooms And their lovely brides! May a kindly heaven smile on them, And, in the way that hens are, May they be prolific Of progeny to equal them in beauty. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Surely here's the promise Of every joy and perfect love! And all the credit Goes to dear Despina. Repeat that joyful music, Renew that lovely song, And we will sit here In highest mirth and glee. The chorus leaves; four servants remain to serve the couples, who seat themselves at the table. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Everything now, my dearest, Accords with my desires. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Joy grows and spreads Throughout my veins. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO You are so beautiful! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA You are so handsome! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO What lovely eyes! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA What an attractive mouth! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Clink glasses and drink! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Drink and clink glasses! FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND FERRANDO In your glass and mine May every care be drowned, And let no memory of the past Remain in our hearts. GUGLIELMO to himself Would that they were drinking poison, The dishonourable jades! SEVENTEENTH SCENE The afore?mentioned; Don Alfonso; then Despina disguised as a notary DON ALFONSO Everything is ready, friends; The notary is coming up the stairs With the marriage contract And ipso facto he'll be here. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Splendid! Let him in at once! DON ALFONSO I'll go and call him. Here he is. DESPINA in a nasal voice Wishing you every happiness, The notary Beccavivi Comes to you with his usual Notarial dignity. And first coughing, Then sitting down, In a clear voice he will read The stipulated contract With the normal provisions In judicial form. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Excellent, in truth! DESPINA By this contract Drawn up by me, The following are joined in matrimony; Fiordiligi with Sempronio, And with Tizio Dorabella, Her legitimate sister; The ladies, natives of Ferrara, The gentlemen, Albanian nobles. And in dowry and settlement ... FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO We know all that! We believe you, We trust you: Give it here, and we'll sign. DESPINA AND DON ALFONSO Excellent, in truth! The paper is in Don Alfonso's hand. The sound of drums is heard. CHORUS off?stage A soldier's life for me! Every day a change of scene; Plenty today and little tomorrow, Now on land and now on sea. FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, DESPINA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO What's that noise? What's that singing? DON ALFONSO Keep quiet: I'll go and see. he goes to the window Mercy on us! God in heaven! Disaster is upon us! I tremble! My blood runs cold! Your former lovers ... FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA My former lover ... DON ALFONSO Are returning, oh heaven, At this moment, And are now disembarking On the shore! FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA, FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO What do I hear? Ye cruel stars! What's to be done At this dire moment? FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Go at once, Quickly, fly; Conceal yourselves, For pity's sake! DESPINA, FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO AND DON ALFONSO Suppose they see us (them)? Suppose we (they) meet them? Don Alfonso leads Despina into a room: Fiordiligi and Dorabella show the men into another. The men escape unseen and go off. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Heaven, help us! Heaven, guide us! Who will save us From this peril? DON ALFONSO Be reassured, Keep calm, Trust in me, And all will be well. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA A thousand cruel thoughts Are tormenting my heart; If they discover the deception Whatever will become of us? FINAL SCENE Fiordiligi and Dorabella, Ferrando and Guglielmo in military cloaks and caps, Despina in a room with Don Alfonso. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Safe and sound, exulting with joy, We return to the loving embrace Of our faithful sweethearts To crown them for their constancy! DON ALFONSO Great heaven! Guglielmo! Ferrando! What joy! You here? How and when? FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Recalled by royal countermand, Our hearts full of contentment and joy, We've returned to our adorable sweethearts, We've returned to your friendship. GUGLIELMO to Fiordiligi But why this pallor, this silence? FERRANDO to Dorabella Why is my love so sad? DON ALFONSO Their tongues are tied With confusion and overwhelming joy. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA My tongue has forsaken me; If I don't die it will be a miracle. The servants bring in a trunk. GUGLIELMO Allow me to have This trunk brought into that room. Heavens, what do I see! A man hidden here! A notary! What's he doing here? DESPINA comes out without a hat No, sit, it's not a notary: It's Despina in fancy dress Who's just back from a ball And come in here to change. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO aside Could so clever a rogue Ever be found? DESPINA Could they ever find Anyone as smart as me? FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Despina? Despina? I don't begin to understand. Don Alfonso cunningly lets fall the contract signed by the women. DON ALFONSO quietly to the men I've just dropped the papers; Pick them up neatly. Ferrando picks up the contract. FERRANDO But what are these papers? GUGLIELMO A marriage contract! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Merciful heaven! You've signed here, Don't try to deny it! Treachery, treachery! Let us find the villains And their blood shall flow In torrents, rivers, oceans! They make to enter the other room; the women prevent them. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA Ah, my love, my sin is mortal And death alone I seek now; Too late I see my error; With your sword pierce this bosom That deserves no pity! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO Tell us all. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA pointing to Despina and Don Alfonso Let them speak for us, That pander and that procuress! DON ALFONSO Too true is what she says, And the proof is shut in there! He indicates the room by which the men first entered. Ferrando and Guglielmo go into it. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA I freeze, I shiver with fright; Why did he give them away? Ferrando and Guglielmo come out of the room, without caps, cloaks and without moustaches, but in the false lovers' clothes, and burlesque their antics with Despina. FERRANDO to Fiordiligi Lovely lady, A noble of Albania Bows before you! GUGLIELMO The miniature Exchanged for the little heart I return herewith, madame! FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO to Despina And to the magnetic doctor I give the honour Which he merited! FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND DESPINA Heavens, what do I see? FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO AND DON ALFONSO They're stupefied! FIORDILIGI, DORABELLA AND DESPINA I cannot bear this torment! FERRANDO, GUGLIELMO AND DON ALFONSO They're half crazy! FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA pointing to Don Alfonso That is the cruel man Who deceived us! DON ALFONSO I deceived you, but my deception Undeceived your lovers, Who henceforth will be wiser And will do as I wish. Give me your hands, now you're united. Embrace each other and say no more. All four of you can laugh now As I have laughed and shall do again. FIORDILIGI AND DORABELLA My love, if this is true, With fidelity and with love I will make good what I have done And adore you evermore. FERRANDO AND GUGLIELMO I believe you, my fair one, But I won't put it to the test. DESPINA I don't know if I'm awake or dreaming, I'm confused, I feel ashamed; I'm slipping badly if they can do to me What I have done to many others. ALL Happy is the man who looks At everything on the right side And through trials and tribulations Makes reason his guide. What always makes another weep Will be for him a cause of mirth And amid the tempests of this world He will find sweet peace.